Book Review & Giveaway
The Dolphin Way:
A Parent’s Guide to Raising Healthy, Happy and Motivated Kids Without Turning Into a Tiger
by Dr. Shimi Kang
In her recently launched book, Dr. Shimi Kang tackles a common problem in society – the pushy, overbearing parent. All too often, well-meaning parents get so caught up in wanting their kids to be successful in life, get good grades in school and choose excellent careers, they fail to make sure that their kids are also successful in life by achieving true happiness. Dr. Kang offers a comprehensive, practical guide to the art of science of inspiring children to develop their own internal drive and a lifelong love of learning.
This book is for any parent who has ever pushed too hard, over-scheduled, worried too much, tried to keep up with the Joneses, shown unrealistic expectations, acted like a controlling helicopter parent or worried about their kids being perfect. Come on, if you are honest, I bet every parent has done at least one of these. It is a natural instinct, but maybe there is a better way?
Through years of observation and study, Dr. Kang presents a model that she believes works, and I believe it has real merit. She believes that both pushy parents, known as “Tiger Parents” and permissive parents “Jellyfish Parents” hinder self-motivation in children and youth. Here suggestion is to try a new powerful new way to parent, “the dolphin way” which is more about being joyful, playful and highly social.
Most of the inspiration for this new model for parents comes from Dr. Kang’s real-life experiences working with youth in her role as director of Child and Youth mental health programs in Vancouver. In her work here, she witnessed case after case of youth suffering the effects of excessive parental pressure including stress, anxiety, addiction and suicide.
Her four-step strategy is based on scientific research and backed up by riveting real stories and presented in a way that is easy to understand and implement. The book walks parents through a logical process, starting by tackling a common parenting dilemma – back off and tame the tiger – and instead trying a new solution – a gentler approach – swimming with the dolphins. Next, we can help our kids achieve success and balance by getting back to basics, using Dr. Kang’s tool kit finally, and finally, see the transformation by helping them live a life of health, happiness and self motivation.
Dr. Kang’s way of thinking lets parents consider the possibility that parents can still achieve their ultimate dream of raising happy, productive and successful children by trying a kinder, gentler parenting method. Her method helps build lifelong success which guides and cultivates creativity, critical thinking, adaptability and community-mindedness and helps children thrive and adapt in an increasingly complex world.
The book challenges parents to ‘face the tiger in them’, take a step back and lighten up on their overbearing expectations, which as Dr. Kang’s vividly points out, can lead to serious, long-term problems later for our kids. Don’t misunderstand – is still OK to want the best for our kids, but we just need to go about helping them achieve success in a different, less pushy way that will help them bring the best out in themselves and achieve happiness. I took away lots of valuable, practical nuggets from this book and it gave me a lot to think about.
About the Author
Kang is a Harvard-trained psychiatrist and expert in human motivation. the medical director for Child and Youth Mental Health for the City of Vancouver as well as an associate professor at the University of British Columbia. Throughout her career, she has helped hundreds of children, adolescents and their parents move towards positive behaviours and better mental health.
Win a Copy of this Book
If you would like to win a copy of this new book, follow the instructions below. You may enter daily until the contest closes on April 30th.
1. Comment below — You can answer any of the following questions..
a) What is your biggest parenting challenge?
b) If you watch Modern Family, who best describes your parenting style? Claire? Phil? Jay? Mitchell? Cameron?
c) What is your parenting style? Tiger? Jellyfish Dolphin? Other?
d) Who would be your all-time favourite TV parents?
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